Parenting

How Much is Too Much When It Comes To Christmas Gifts?

If you have been on any social media platform this week then I’m sure you have heard about a statement Mila Kunis made about how her and her husband have decided to not give their kids Christmas presents. I guess last Christmas their daughter got too many gifts and she just wanted more stuff and didn’t seem to appreciate anything. This is a debate that I have heard many times before and caused a lot of controversy. It was no different this week with so many people sharing their opinions on the subject. How much is too much when it comes to Christmas Presents for your kids?

IΒ  have heard many parents debate that they decided not to give their children any presents or just one or two gifts. This way, they are learning the value of things and appreciate gifts more. Also, they want their kids to learn that there are other kids in the world who have even less and they should be thankful for having everything they need.

On the other side of the debate are the parents who believe that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with spoiling their kids when it come to Christmas time. Those who grew up in low income families and didn’t get much for Christmas themselves. So now they want to make sure their kids have the kind of Christmas they never had and only fantasized about.

My question is, why does there have to be a debate at all? We all come from different families, cultures, backgrounds and believes. We all do what we think is best for our children. We are all raising our kids with our own rules and to have the same visions in life that we do. That is, until they grow up and start to have a mind of their own and form their own opinions and beliefs. Which to me is the objective. Β How many gifts other parents decide to give or not to give their children during Christmas is their choice. They all have their reasons for the choices they make to fit their parenting style. Which is different for everyone. Who’s to say who is right and who is wrong? At the end of the day we’re all pretty much learning as we go in this parenting thing.

In our household we haven’t quite decided what to do when it comes to gift giving during Christmas time for our daughter. My husband and I stopped giving each other gifts a while ago. Instead we like to go on spontaneous trips or resort vacations. We also give each other random gifts all throughout the year so we don’t miss gift giving on Christmas. I have thought about just giving her one gift from us and one from Santa. I do want he to understand that there kids in the world who do not receive anything on Christmas and she should be very thankful. But I also don’t want her to feel left out and see her friends or classmates get gifts and she not get anything at all. This is most likely the way we will go. But of my friend or another mom I know decides to give their kids the whole lego store for Christmas then who am I to judge? That’s fine too.

Last year was Emma’s first Christmas and we kept it very simple. She had no idea what was going on so there was no reason to give her a million things. Plus she got more stuff from her grandparents and other family members. Which also brings me to another point. We won’t try to control what others want to give her. If they would like to give her a lot of gifts or just one then we’ll be thankful anyway. I think it’s kind of rude to tell a family member not to give your child a gift or try to dictate what to give them. I feel like it’s almost pressuring them into giving them something. How do I even know they were planning on giving them a gift in the first place?

Christmas is a time to be grateful and spend time with loved ones. A time to be happy and enjoy quiality time with those who we care about the most. It’s also a great time to give back and be there for those have are less fortunate. This is definitely something I will teach my daughter was well. I’ve always tried to participate in any sort of charity or volunteering during Christmas time and I’ll make sure to get my daughter involved as well as she gets older.

How many gifts others give or don’t give to their children should be the last of our worries. We need to stop judging other’s parenting choices and understand that we are all different. As long as we are all raising respectful, generous, kind and loving children that’s all that matters.

 

Did you hear this week about the statement Mika Kunis made about not giving their children Christmas gifts? It sparked a lot of debate and here's my take on it.

22 Comments

  1. I agree when they are little there’s no need to go overboard. The grandparents usually cover the presents while they’re little, at least in our family they do! and I also agree we need to stop judging other moms. As long as the child isn’t abused and is safe, just let other people parent and decide whats best for their littles. πŸ™‚ great post!

    1. Exactly. As long as the kids are happy and healthy that’s all that matters. 😊

  2. I’m so tired of all the Mama Wars. Sigh. Really, we need to be supporting each other, not tearing each other down. That being said, everyone needs to do what is best for their family.
    We go crazy for Christmas and birthdays here because that’s what we decided was best. I grew up celebrating that way and I loved it and wanted my boys to experience that too. I don’t buy them lots of “junky” toys, but I try to get them toys and crafts and experiences that they will use, love, and enjoy all year round and beyond. We do have Amazon wishlists for our families that live far away an opportunity to shop if they so desire, but my kiddos are grateful for everything (and we do require them to write Thank You notes for birthday presents and at least a thank you email/text for Christmas gifts). The Amazon wishlists make it easy to shop and ship directly to us.
    I totally respect those parents who just buy one or two gifts, or do the something you want, something you need, something to wear, something to read. That’s awesome and that is what works for your family.

    1. The amazon wish list is an awesome idea. Especially if you have family that lives far away. Everyone should find what works for them and what will make their holiday enjoyable for them and their whole family. And yes we should definitely be supporting each other more and not tearing each other down. Being a mom it’s already hard enough to not be on each other’s teams.

  3. H yang

    It’s crazy what people buy as gifts. I tell all of my siblings to not spend more than $15.00 because he has so much toys and etc already.

    1. Yes I think the though is was counts and not how much is spent. Plus when they’re so little they rather play with wrapping paper or empty boxes than the actual gift lol.

  4. We buy our kids things through out the year so Christmas is small. Also one of our children has a disability and early on we learned to invest in things that are higher quality then the fad toys. For example we do stockings (20 dollars worth,) a book, PJs, something they need, and something they want. We like to focus more on experiences then presents.

    1. That’s a great idea and I think it makes for much better gifts. And I absolutely agree that it’s more about the experiences than anything else.

  5. Meagan

    When kids are younger, they really don’t get the concept of gifts but now that I have 3 kids 10 years old and older wow! My 10 year old not only has her list but she typed it, printed it and gave my mom and I 2 copies each. My mom loves to spoil her grandkids, especially at Christmas but I am putting my foot down this year. Each of my kids are involved in sports so they will be getting what they NEED for their respective sport and that is it. They will be learning that Christmas is not all about the gifts and how much they got but the value of being grateful for what they got because most of that stuff ends up in a closet anyway.

    1. Lol she is so cute. I love how she prepared her letters and gave two copies each like just in case you lose one lol. Yes I agree it’s about being greatful and thankful.

  6. I agree that each family should do their own gift giving, we debate every year on this topic. Now that my children are in school I can see a difference; some of my children’s friends get extravagant gifts from Santa, some get ALL their gifts from Santa and some get one. It can be hard during this transition of believing to understand why Santa brings little or less… That’s our concern.

    1. That makes me really sad actually. I would hate for a child to just get one gift from santa and see his classmate get a whole lot and wonder why santa only got him one. Breaks my heart.

  7. This is a great post. You are right. It will be different for each family. It’s best not to get caught up in judging what other parents want to do in terms of gifts for their kids. Let’s just all enjoy one another and be kind.

    1. Well said Mary! We should all just support each other and not judge!

  8. I totally agree with you on this post! Each family decides how they want to celebrate Christmas, and we need to stop judging other parents. I just want my kids to know the true meaning of Christmas and be grateful for what they receive instead of wanting more, more, and more.

    1. Well said Margaret! I completely agree with you too!

  9. It’s true! It’s different for each family and I just love to enjoy the day having fun with our family and my boys’ excitement and anticipation leading up to Christmas is fun!

    1. That’s what Christmas is all about. Spending it with our loved ones!

  10. Shell

    I think families should celebrate however they see fit and not be judging other families for doing more or less. It’s a personal decision for each family. There is no right or wrong.

    1. Exactly Shell! I agree with you. We should all just enjoy the season with our loved ones and be merry!

  11. I so agree with this! Plus we have such a big family that’s it is so hard to give them a list and buy anything ourselves. My daughters birthday is New Years Eve, so last year we got her clothes and went to the zoo for our gifts!

    1. Yes having a big family can make it even harder. The zoo is a great gift! my daughter was born a month after Christmas so last year she got a lot for Christmas from grandparents and aunts and uncles and then got so much for her birthday. We had no space for so many toys!

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